Hurt feelings

Why is it that words from some people carry more weight - and in some cases cut deeper - than those of others?

Words are just words. They can be used for loving and they most certainly can be used for fighting. The loving words fall around us, playing gently on our egos, but those used in anger often resonate for far longer, setting up camp for an extended period in your brain, sometimes slipping out of memory, but never for long.

I struggle to remember the last time someone said something so nice to me that it made me cry (happy tears), but I can tell you exactly the last time someone of significance said something that cut straight to the bone and hurt like hell - it was not quite two hours ago - hence the need for the blog!!!

Without going into too much detail, I made a comment which was in all honestly critical, not of a person, but of an act, and it instantly caused offence. I was called 'catty', a word I personally detest. And a word I didn't think I deserved. I made a professional criticism, and was criticised for it.

The conversation was terminated pretty quickly after that (not by me), with the invitation for me to let my friend know when I wanted to 'chat sensibly again'.

Hmmm, now it seems not only am I catty, but I am not sensible - and understandably (in my opinion) I've got my back up now.

For those of you who know me, you will appreciate that I take both my profession and my common sense, or sensibility, pretty seriously. Don't get me wrong, I love to muck about and be silly, and I'm open to constructive criticism, but one thing I'm not is 'silly' (my interpretation of not being sensible).

Given that those words have come from a friend they have hurt far more than coming from Joe Average off the street.

And what possibly hurt the most was that I was painted as 'the bad guy', when all I have done is love and support and utter copious words of affection and praise to this friend. One thing I'm not generally is nasty, unless you really get on my bad side, and then, my friends, you will know about it.

So, where to from here? I don't wish to argue with my friend, but I do need to stand up for myself I feel, to make it clear that I am entitled to an opinion. Should I apologise? I believe life is far too short for arguments, but are we really arguing?

Should I give it time? Time heals all hurt they say. But is my friend hurt? Or is is just my feelings?

At this point I don't know what to do. I don't want to fight with my precious friend, but I feel I have been treated unfairly.

Maybe a good night's sleep will bring clarity to me in the morning.

Sweet dreams dear friends.

Mwah Ellie xxx