Wired for sound

Breathe in, breathe out, try not to choke yourself on the leads - sounds pretty straightforward hey??

So last night I spent the night at the Hamilton Hospital as part of a sleep study to find out a) why I always wake up so damn tired, and b) what is causing that noise that has become almost socially disruptive (who wants to sleep next to someone snoring and spluttering all night??).

So, rather than see it as a medical intrusion, I thought of it as a bit of a holiday, a minibreak if you must. I headed over on my solo roadtrip and checked into Hotel de la Hospitale for a bit of r'n'r.

Yeah, I was kidding myself. It wasn't much of a break. I came home even more tired than I left, and I'm on Struggle Street today, in fact I would even go as far to say that I'm the Mayor of Struggletown.

Anyhoo, let me set the scene for last night's little trial.

It was held in a house environment, except for the beds - of course they were those poxy little hospital beds.

I had to PJ-up early so I could be wired for sound - literally. I had tiny patches attached all over my face, on my chest and down my legs. A microphone was also taped to my chest, two movement belts were stretched around my tummy, and oxygen measuring prongs were placed in my nostrils and across my top lip. All of this was tied like a long pony tail down my back and then connected to a masterboard above the bed - so I wasn't going anywhere!!!

That wasn't too bad - but then they turned on the video camera - which kinda creeped me out.

The video camera was above the bed, next to the tv, and filmed me from the chest up. I tried pretending it wasn't there, but subconsciously it bothered me. I kept trying to open my eyes just a tiny bit to see if it was working, and without them noticing me - but it didn't work!!!

Therefore it took me ages to fall asleep, but once I did I was ok - for about three hours, until one of the leads came loose from my head, and I woke to find a bobbing spotlight near my bed!!!

It's possibly in the realms of too much info - but that seemed the perfect opportunity for a toilet stop, which again posed many challenges. Much plugging and unplugging took place, before I could drag my metres and metres of leads to the loo down the hall, and then back again, with the nurse repeating the plugging and unplugging. Good grief - couldn't I have a catheter??? Actually no, I will take the plugging and unplugging anyday!!!

Fortunately tho there were another couple of hours of sleep to follow, yaay for that, but I was still out the door at 6am (Vic time of course), feeling rather unrefreshed and definitely more weary for the effort.

So now there will be a two week wait for the results, followed by a consult with a sleep specialist - and hopefully some answers.

All in all it wasn't too unpleasant, just another night of broken sleep!!!

What could have been improved??? Perhaps a more comfy bed, and definitely the provision of some hot young thing whom I could have wrapped myself around - I reckon that would have done the trick!!!

Mwah, Ellie xxx, or should that be zzz???